Fight the Fluff (Part 2): Why Grammar and Syntax Matter in Business Copy

Grammar and syntax might not be the most crowd-pleasing topics, but if you need business copy that's clear, concise and gets to the point, they're just as important as creativity.

Even though words are my ’thing’, I know mentioning grammar and syntax can empty a room faster than the giant spider that scurried past my sofa last night (*shudders*). Hell, even I look for the nearest exit when anyone mentions the subjunctive mood (*more shuddering*).

With a lot of copywriting, the focus – quite rightly – is on creativity. Eye-catching intros. Immersive stories. Witty wordplay. And calls to action your potential customers can’t resist. It’s not on subjects, verbs or dangling modifiers.

She knew mentioning grammar and syntax had been a risk.

But while you’re grabbing the attention of your readers with your creative flair, it’s easy to forget something just as essential in business copy, and that’s clarity. A clever line might draw readers in, but they’re not going to stick around if it’s followed by loads of yawn-inducing word fluff or overly complex sentences.

Clear and concise text keeps your readers engaged and ensures they quickly understand your point – and why they should care about it. It also builds trust and credibility, saves time and space, and leads to better SEO performance and higher conversion rates. And that’s why, when copywriting or editing, I’m as focused on clarity as I am on creativity.

Six grammar and syntax red flags

When I’m working on business copy, I’ll always park the creativity for a while and spend time looking for any grammar and syntax issues, such as those below, that could be affecting clarity. These red flags may seem minor, but when they can cause confusion, muddle a message or bore the pants off your potential customers, they can have a major impact.

Smothered verbs

No, smothered verbs aren’t the topic of a new word-related true crime podcast, they’re just verbs that have been replaced by a noun phrase. Verbs bring a sense of ‘doing’ that keeps people engaged, but if that verb is substituted with a noun phrase, it smothers that action, adds extra words and kills the flow of a sentence. Signs of smothered verbs are nouns ending in ‘-able’, ‘-ion’, ‘-nce’, ‘-ent’ or ‘-ent’.

Fluffed: The company made an announcement…

De-fluffed: The company announced…

Fluffed: We’re planning the introduction of…

De-fluffed: We’re introducing…

Unnecessary waffle

Similar to redundancy, as highlighted in part one, fluff can also form when too many words or phrases are used. Readers don’t want to wade through unnecessary waffle, so if anything can be removed without impacting the meaning or can be replaced with something punchier, the red pen comes out.

Fluffed: At this point in time, we have now taken the decision to announce the introduction of new guidelines relating to working from home.

De-fluffed: We are introducing new working from home guidelines.

Passive voice

A ‘grammatical voice’ can be active or passive. In the simplest terms, the active voice is when the subject of the sentence performs the action. And the passive voice is when the subject receives the action.

Active: She pressed play on the remote.

Passive: The play button on the remote was pressed by her.

Active: Over 200 people attended the screening.

Passive: The screening was attended by over 200 people.

Active voice is usually the best choice for business copy as it’s more engaging, direct and dynamic. Passive voice isn’t wrong, but it can make text overly long and formal. And it can make it unclear who’s doing what. Passive voice does work better in some situations, such as if it’s unclear (or we don’t want to say) who did something, if it’s a general statement, or if the recipient of the action is more important.

Passive: Mistakes were made. (We don’t know or don’t want to say who made the mistakes.)

Passive: The new streaming service will be launched in October. (Emphasises what’s being launched, not who’s launching it.)

Dangling modifiers

An issue I regularly see, particularly in text that’s been edited to meet a word count, is dangling modifiers. It’s fine to start sentences with introductions (modifiers) that don’t mention a subject. But if the words that follow don’t make it clear what that intro was talking about, the modifier is left dangling and confusion arises. In the below examples, ’audiences’ aren’t ’full of shocking plot twists’ and ’Tim’ isn't ’rising unevenly in the oven’ (we hope). The corrections clear up any confusion.

This: Full of shocking plot twists, audiences across the country are gripped by the latest series.

Should be: Full of shocking plot twists, the latest series is gripping audiences across the country.

This: Rising unevenly in the oven, Tim began to wish he’d just bought the bread instead.

Should be: As his dough rose unevenly in the oven, Tim began to wish he’d just bought the bread instead.

Negativity

Using words such as ‘not’, ‘no’ and ‘avoid’ or words starting in ‘un-’ or ‘dis-’ can mean readers have to work harder to understand what’s being said. And it can also paint a gloomier picture than intended. Both sentences below mean the same thing, but the second, more positive version is easier to understand, shorter and less likely to plant seeds of doubt.

This: There is no reason to believe this drama will not appeal to our viewers.

Becomes: This drama will appeal to our viewers.

The more negatives there are, or even double negatives, the fuzzier the meaning gets. Negative phrasing can have more impact in some situations, however, such as in commands or instructions.

This: Do not open the emergency exit.

Has more impact than: The emergency exit should remain closed.

Readability

In literature or academia, stylistic choices or complex points can lead to mammoth sentences and paragraphs (author Jonathan Coe holds the current record for the longest English sentence, which comes in at a brain-jangling 13,955 words!). But in business writing, where readability is a priority, shorter sentences and paragraphs will keep readers focused on the message and why it matters to them. If a reader needs to decipher a complex sentence or wade through a huge block of text, their attention is likely to wander. Varying sentence and paragraph lengths also keeps writing dynamic and engaging, and headings help guide readers – and search engines – through text.

Readability can be measured through AI tools such as ProWritingAid, Readable or WebFX – although any AI-generated suggestions should be double checked – or via Microsoft Word’s spelling and grammar checker. The latter provides scores for Flesch Reading Ease and the Flesch-Kincaid Grade Level (see example below), which indicate the approximate reading grade level of a text, corresponding to US grade levels. The advice is that “text intended for readership by the general public should aim for a [Flesch-Kincaid] grade level of around 8, schooling age 13 to 14”.

Example of readability statistics available via Word

If you need business copy that combines creativity with clarity, but have a million more interesting things to do than think about grammar and syntax, why not ask me about my freelance copywriting or editing services? I’m always happy to chat through your requirements. Unless it involves the subjunctive mood 😬. Or spiders 😬😬.